I Hate Wolverine's Bone Claws, Too ~ The Geek Twins

Source:  I Hate Wolverine's Bone Claws, Too ~ The Geek Twins    Tag:  i hate humans
Now that the Wolverine movie is out, it's time to visit one of my many sore spots over the current state of comic book characters. I haven't followed comics regularly in over ten years, so I was unaware until recently that they had established that Wolverine's claws weren't added in the Weapon X procedure. He was born with bone claws. Weapon X just put adamantium over them. This, to me, makes absolutely no sense. A lot of my arguments were articulated on the very well-written post on Your Mom's Basement, "I Hate Bone Claws." I'll just do a run-through.

  1. They've always established that you only get one mutant power. Wolverine's power was rapid healing. Bone claws have nothing to do with rapid healing, so that means he was born with two mutant powers.
  2. No animal in nature has claws made of bone. That means a completely weird and bizarre ability developed out of nowhere on Wolverine.
  3. The bone claws look stupid. The adamantium claws are sleek and sharp, the bone claws are bumpy and weird.
  4. The bone claws are obviously a retcon, added later to explain why he could have his adamantium ripped off and still be Wolverine. They could've had Logan go to Mr. Fantastic or somebody and get replacement claws surgically added. Adding the bone claws after decades of history is lazy writing.
In addition, the bone claws are a lame substitute for his metal claws. Because they're only sharp on the ends! He can't slice through anything, just stab stuff. Wolverine doesn't stab, he slices. And as we saw in the movie, bones can be broken. I think Wolverine's bone claws are a sign of how crappy and convoluted comics have become.

In a related story...Spider-Man had "stingers?!" I didn't see that, and I'm glad I didn't. What is wrong with these writers? Why can't they just leave well enough alone?! This is why I don't read comics faithfully anymore, besides the three dollar price tag per issue. When I pick up a comic, I want to see that superhero as I always liked him to be. I want to see Spider-Man, the Hulk, or Wolverine. I don't want Spider-Man in armor and with stingers. I don't want a talking Hulk who's also a secret agent. And I don't want Wolverine with no adamantium and bone claws.